I’d rather be a sparrow than a snail.
Coming to terms with it.
Thursday, while cooking dinner for a friend and her 22 month old, I got a call from the hubs (still in Iraq). The purpose of this phone call was to inform me- rather bluntly- that he has been “penciled in” to move to Kadena AFB in the late summer/early Fall of this year. During the phone call I had many questions: why so soon, we just got here? Is it an upgrade in position? How long would we be there?
Only after we hung up did the real issues start to creep into my mind. I just bought a cloth diaper business which I LOVE running; am about to have another baby; just bought a new car, etc. I was up half the night weighing the pros and cons of going there. I’ve sacrificed quite a long list of things for his career including time with him- he’s been away from us for 19 or 20 of the past 25 months (which is the only timeframe that counts as its how old Paige is). This move would mean MAJOR sacrifice. I’d have to totally quit working in any capacity and be a full-time stay-at-home mom with no ‘outside thing’ for myself. We won’t see family for at least three years. I’ll have to give my cat (which I’ve had for 8 years) away. We’ll only be able to bring half of our belongings.
Then I woke up Friday morning and the shear terror of this potential move hit me: Kadena AFB is on the island of Okinawa. In Japan. What are the odds that on the eve of one of the biggest natural disasters in world history we find out we’re moving to the very country where the disaster occurred?!?!?!
I’ve wanted to live in Japan since I was 12 years old but the timing is the shittiest imaginable; both in our own lives and with what happened there merely hours after we got this news.
This is without question some sort of cosmic test for me. I can only hope I’m up to the challenge in both the literal and karmic senses. Its gonna be a long 3 years.
At least I get to learn Japanese and consume boatloads of sushi and sake.
Possibly in bad taste. But also the coolest costume I have ever seen. She should be holding a beer and ciggie, too.
Halloween costume by an awesome (pregnant) person.
Things that have happened since my last post:
1) We have sold the albatross of a condo we own in Las Vegas. Thank you Army Corps of Engineers! We are forever in your debt. This sole benefit to being in the military may keep Jared in for life.
2) We have learned that Paige will be a big sister in about 7 months! This would be less exciting had it not been for item number 1 above; thus is place as number 2. If we couldn’t afford another baby it would have been foolish to plan for one! So checklist was: 1) sell condo 2) get pregnant. Done and done.
3) Jared has reached the half-way point of Weapons School. Thank you Buddha. We all (collectively) can’t wait for this chapter to be over!
The death of Denver Broncos wide receiver Kenny McKinley was announced last night, his death an apparent suicide and the news making national headlines. I went to school with Kenny in Austell, GA at South Cobb High School. We shared three years in the same uniform, both on the football field as…
I am not what you think I am. I am not what I think I am. I am what you think I think I am.
“
| — | Unknown |
You ever have a song where every time you hear it you find it personally relevant? You deem it “your song” because it sort of speaks to you? For the longest time (like 15 years) that song for me was ‘Think Too Much’ from ‘Hearts and Bones’….. “I started to think too much when I was 12 going on 13….”.
Anyway, a little less than a year ago I found a new song that spoke to me but in a sort of backwards way. Its got one line, towards the end of the track, that is spot on for a very special time in my life:
“half of my heart is a shotgun wedding to a bride with a paper ring”
I was a bride with a paper ring (see photo above) as my now husband cleverly, and without me catching on, fashioned a ring out of a $100 bill and a dime while at the table at Nobu in Dallas. See, its a dime-in-ring. Mad Origami skills, I know. He proposed and this lovely cattle rancher and his wife who were seated next t us picked up the tab for our entire meal. Everything really is bigger in Texas- even the random acts of kindness.
Shortly after creating this magnificent bauble he informed me that he’d like to get married three weeks later. Yes, three weeks. His impending deployment to Iraq had him wanting to take a wife I suppose. We lived in Las Vegas at the time so we had an easy solution. I always wanted to be a wife; could easily leave behind being a bride.
The rest of the song is well written and enjoyable but not all that relevant to my own life (although it makes me feel for those who aren’t as lucky in love as myself). I suppose it couldn’t hurt to ask but I’m pretty sure that in spite of the shotgun-ness and paper ring, I got all of his heart.
Love you madly, miss you terribly! See you soon!
